I’m a Total Slacker


I haven’t been grocery shopping in, like months. OK, tiny exaggeration, but it’s been long enough that I ran out of things for lunches for Elijah. So this morning before dropping him off at day camp, I stopped at Giant Eagle to buy him a Lunch-able (please don’t judge). He decided he wanted to wait in the car since he was munching on the hash brown I bought him at McDonald’s when I stopped to get coffee ( I know I know… I don’t deserve the Mother of the Year award for that combo). So I locked the car doors and run inside to get him an uber healthy Lunch-able. Since it was only me and like 2 other people shopping at the time, I figured it’d be a quick in and out experience. After I picked his stuff up, I stopped in the chips aisle to get me some pretzels. I’m standing there staring at the pretzels, trying to decide between regular and Honey Wheat Stix, as if my life depended on it. So while I’m standing there making this life-altering decision, I hear feet pounding through the store, coming closer. It took everything in me to tear my eyes away from the pretzels, but as I did, I see Elijah FLY by the aisle. He looked down and saw me, but was literally running so fast he just Could. Not. Stop. I called his name, he turns around and the look on his face immediately has me scared to. He was all “IjustwantedsomewaterI’msorrycaralarmwantedwatersothirsty”. His eyes were ginormous and he had tears in them and I wasn’t sure what to do with the words he just gave me. I told him to take a deep breath and start over.

This is totally what his face would have looked like if he was like 20 years older. And white.

Apparently, he tried to open the door to get out and the car alarm went off while he was sitting inside, which FREAKED him out (Well, duh, it would have freaked me out too)! So he was running through the store like a mad man trying to find me. We went outside to turn it off and it had already stopped, so I hit the unlock button on my remote- I don’t know why. The alarm started going off again and I wasn’t sure how to make it stop. There was an old man sitting in his car chain-smoking and was between us and the car. He was clearly unhappy with the situation based by his sour-puss face, but thankfully we couldn’t hear what he was yelling over the alarm (he actually reminded me of the old man from Up, as he was in the beginning, but real). I kept pushing buttons until it was quiet, then we went back in, got the groceries, and got my poor little man some water.

I was truly dying to laugh, but Elijah has quite the sensitive soul, and I didn’t want to push him over the edge, what with all the adrenaline or whatever running through his body. But I’m not going to lie- I laughed most of the way to work (not like constantly laughing, because that would have been weird. More like the random laughs that bubble up out of nowhere and make you look like an idiot because you driving all alone and laughing laugh.)

In case you were wondering: I totally chose the Honey Wheat Stix. I mean, was there really ever a choice??ย  ๐Ÿ™‚


12 thoughts on “I’m a Total Slacker

  1. I can’t stop lol!! I don’t think there was a choice..lol
    Thank you so much for linking up in Exposure 99% weekday blog hop, and I look forward being part of your blog, following via facebook..

  2. Honey Wheat Stix are amazing. I have a pumpkin dip recipe and I usually buy those to dip. mmmm, yum!!
    Also, it’s for this reason that I still have Aiden the “DO NOT OPEN THE DOORS” speech when I have to run in somewhere. LOL

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